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Your FE Connection
Celebrating Feminine Energy
in Everyone |
 We all need coaching. How else do we see our blind spots? Who will help us see the big picture around us and pull us forward into the unknown? Who will shepherd us with compassion and care into places we’ve never been before? Friends, spouses, and family members serve other purposes. If we really want to stretch ourselves, we need a coach. I have been absent on social media for a while. I’ve been doing deep reflection on myself and my business. I want to go to the “next level” and have been exploring what that means for me and what it will take. Over the years I’ve invested in many training programs and coaches. However, I never really invested in my mindset because I assumed that being committed to my dream was all that mattered. I also invested in a lot of techniques and strategies but ultimately have not yet built the wildly successful business of my dreams. Enter David Bayer.  Last fall I saw David Bayer’s interview on Impact Theory, “Shift into a Powerful Mindset at Any Time, in Any Situation.” I had never heard anyone talk quite like David before. I was impressed. I attended his two-day business and mind-set intensive training in Miami, FL in November. It was, the most transformative learning experience I’ve ever had in a very long time. To say that he has positively affected me more than any other trainer in decades would be an understatement. With other successful thought leaders that I've followed in the past I always felt like they were holding something back so they could enroll me in their next big launch. David, on the other hand, holds nothing back. His two-day business and mind-set intensive training allowed me to become much more self-aware, a gift that has impacted my personal life, my marriage, and my ability to carry out my business plans. His business training and coaching is the missing puzzle piece that I wish I had had 5 years ago. I’m learning exactly what to do, I have support, and I’m motivated and focused every day.  I’d love to share this experience with you. Do you need a change in your life? Are you looking for what is next for you? Are you growing a business?
David is holding his annual Powerful Living Experience in March in Orlando, FL. I am going, and I want to bring as many people as I can to experience David’s life-changing teachings. I have the privilege of giving away as many complimentary tickets as I want until they're all gone. If you are starting or running your own business and have hit a brick wall, or you want to grow in your self-awareness and ability to be present in the moment, then please reach out to me and I'll set you up. You can comment below or email using the button below. This event will provide you with awareness, clarity, and motivation. I promise. This will be event you look back on as the one that got you unstuck. I look forward to hearing from you.
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 Sexual harassment in the workplace is going up, not down. Approximately 80% of women in the US report experiencing some sort of sexual harassment in the workplace. Look around at your female co-workers. Pick out a group of you and nine others. Chances are that eight of you will be harassed at least once in your career. Will it be you? Your best friend? Why does this keep happening? Most employees, 73 % report that their managers do not challenge the use of inappropriate language or behavior in the workplace. So, it’s up to us to stand up for ourselves. But there is a big problem.  Women (not all targets of sexual harassment are women, but most are) I talk with say they are shocked when a harasser, which I call a perpetrator (it’s stronger, and I like it) harasses them. I feel the same way. It happens to four out of five women, but we’re still surprised when gross, obscene, juvenile behaviors are targeted at us at work. It’s time to be prepared. Chances are that you will be harassed. Get ready. Practice for how you will react. Get in front of the mirror, and practice. Yes, practice. There's a good chance it's going to happen, so get ready.  "We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.” Have you ever taken a self-defense class? Do you own insurance? Same thing. Prepare for a bad thing that may happen to you. This will give you confidence. There is a good chance you will be one of the four out of five. So, get ready. Imagine you’re being harassed. What do you do? One - Understand that this person
 Five - Check your voice. You want to keep your voice low but not quiet. This is not time for a squeaky “Minnie Mouse” voice. Six - Say something to break the flow of action or activity. You can say, “Stop that. That is really inappropriate.” You can ask, “Why are you being that way?” or “What exactly do you mean by that?” Seven - At this point, you may want to just leave, or you may want to listen to your perp explain themselves and apologize. If/when a discussion ensues, your perp needs to understand that they are wrong and agree to not engage in this kind of grossly misguided behavior again. They need to apologize. “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” The only acceptable outcome is for you to feel good about standing up for yourself. Feel powerful. Know that you would do this again. You are in the right. Under no circumstances is it okay for this behavior to be tolerated by a company. It’s the law. And this behavior undermines productivity and retention of talent. Now, go watch Kill Bill, and feel like a badass, because you are! We don’t expect this kind of behavior in a professional setting, but it happens everyday. Almost every woman I’ve talked to in my career has had some experience with being harassed. Since it is almost inevitable, get ready to handle it. Be strong. Take responsibility. Be a leader. Tell your perp they are way out of line and should never act like this again.  Let your perp know that you two will be okay as long as they stop their stupid behavior. Then drop it. Unless, of course it continues. Then you need to report them.
It’s up to us to change company cultures. We can do this. For more stories and suggestions on preventing sexual harassment, read my book, Feminine Emergence. I’d love to hear about your experiences and questions. Please comment below.  ID 111683277 © Laurence Agron | Dreamstime.com Malcolm Gladwell writes in his book, The Tipping Point (2000), that a tipping point is "the moment of critical mass, the threshold, the boiling point." Gladwell writes that social changes spread when there is enough momentum, attention, or energy and can be started by just a few seemingly small-impact events. What does this have to do with Feminine Emergence? And first of all, what is Feminine Emergence? Feminine Emergence is a process. When feminine energy grows and becomes stronger than it was before. The process relates to women’s empowerment and the sense for all of us that it’s healthy and safe to embrace feminine energy. The tipping point is that magic moment when an idea, trend, or social behavior crosses a threshold, tips, and spreads like wildfire.  What is feminine energy? First of all, it’s not gender. It can be related to gender, but it doesn’t have to be. Both men and women have feminine energy. Women have it more. Feminine energy is what Eastern cultures call “Yin”. Elements of Feminine Energy include compassion, creativity, a worldview, environmental focus, creativity, embracing emotions, intuition, and win-win solutions. When we are kind, nurturing, or vulnerable, we are acting in our feminine energy. We are seeing more feminine energy in corporate cultures. As we have more women in professional and leadership roles, corporate cultures will have more feminine energy. What is masculine energy? Masculine energy is what Eastern cultures call “Yang”. Masculine energy is competitive, action oriented, outwardly focused, independent, aggressive, confident, and strong. When we are analytical, systematic, objective, technical, direct, or participate in linear reasoning, we are in our masculine energy.  Masculine energy is a lot of fun. I enjoy it, and it has served me well in my career. It serves us well as a culture and economy also. When a culture becomes overly masculinized, as many work cultures have, we see bullying, harassment, greed, and other dysfunctions that undermine what we are looking for – which is engagement, productivity, innovation, and profitability. The process of Feminine Emergence can happen for a person, a group (like a family or a work group), or a company or society. In our culture masculine energy has traditionally been more valued, so it has been exhibited more frequently. When feminine energy bubbles up, that is Feminine Emergence. This is what we’re seeing now in society and work cultures.  Energy is shifting. Feminine Emergence is in the zeitgeist. In the last three years, we have seen feminine energy being more valued and exhibited in professional organizations. We now have more women in Congress and more women CEO’s and board members of Fortune 500 companies. This is changing work cultures. For example, we see behaviors of “collaboration” and “relationship building” being valued among leaders. These are aspects of feminine energy.
We are experiencing what I think Gladwell would describe as a tipping point, a cultural change with no going back. In the #MeToo and #TimesUp era, work cultures are changing to be less tolerant of all forms of harassment and more inclusive of feminine styles of leadership. We’ve seen other tipping points in our time. When people realized that personal computers were not a luxury but a necessary business and educational tool, that was a tipping point. Once we got on the personal computer bandwagon, momentum built. There was no going back. This will be the same. There will be no turning back. Read more about Feminine Emergence in my Amazon.com best-selling book, FE Feminine Emergence. Please share this article and your thoughts with your community. Like, tweet, share and comment! I love comments! Please put your comments and questions below, and let's stay in touch. Thank you so much!  One of my dearest and most admired friends passed away unexpectedly on Monday. I’m shocked and so very sad. We met as colleagues, and later he became a dear friend and mentor. One of the benefits of work and career is meeting great people, people you can develop relationships with. Ron and I developed a friendship when our offices were next door to each other. We went to lunch often and discussed our work, families, politics, religion, health and more. We talked about so many things you’re not supposed to talk about at work. Many times we agreed. Other times we respectfully disagreed. We built trust and respect over time. I admired Ron’s intellect, razor-sharp wit, and artistic sensibility. Ron studied literature at Harvard and playwriting at Yale. He was creative, insightful, and talented, while being soft spoken and compassionate. He was a talented painter and wrote and published five novels. He liked to hike and travel. He was active in his community. He loved his wife and two sons infinitely.  "A sweet friendship refreshes the soul." Ron mentored me while we were both still in the corporate world. As synchronicity would have it, we were laid off on the same day as part of a massive layoff. We talked that afternoon about how our layoffs had played out for both of us. As we both started our consulting practices, his in communications and marketing and mine in consulting and coaching, we shared war stories and lessons learned. He was patient and supportive, always a great listener and wise advisor. When I was ready to publish my book, Feminine Emergence, I asked Ron to skim a couple of chapters and give me a pre-release review. Ron jumped on it right away. He read my whole book and gave me a wonderful review. He told me at lunch that I was a good writer, which brought tears of pride to my eyes. This complement from Ron meant the world to me. He told me that he could not put my book down, that it was a compelling read and an important book.  "Friends are the flowers in the garden of life." Careers can be tough, long and arduous, unforgiving, even unrewarding. Don’t miss out on the chance to make friends at work. It is one of the most wonderful blessings of work that is available to us. To build a friendship like mine and Ron’s requires vulnerability, honesty, and sometimes forgiveness. It’s worth it. Ron was a gem of a man. I learned so much from him. Our friendship made my life richer. Ron was not a "work friend." He was my friend. I encourage you to be open to similar opportunities. Early in my career I worked with another man, a wonderful man named Don. Don was charming, funny and kind. He mentored me while I was in my 20’s. Don died too early of pancreatic cancer. His funeral was the first funeral I ever attended. It was sad as hell. It was a packed house, and everyone was crying. Don had eight pallbearers. I knew all of them because I worked with them. Don’s coworkers were his dear friends, and they carried him, physically, on his final journey. It was lovely to see the camaraderie and love of the men carrying Don. I’ll never forget it.  Making friends and building relationships at work enhances work and life experience tremendously. Caring about your work and the people you work with increases engagement and productivity. It adds quality to life. It expands one’s sense of community and purpose.
Don’t have friends at work? Go make some. Have a few superficial friends at work? Deepen the relationships. Invite someone to lunch. Get to know them. Let them know you. Build relationships. You’ll be grateful you did. ***RIP, Ron. *** Dear reader, I love comments. Please comment below. It's a great way to connect.  You’re in a meeting, and you have a great idea. It won’t come out of your mouth. You’re quiet. Two minutes later, Jeff says your idea. He doesn’t explain it as well as you would’ve, but he’s got it out there. Everyone loves the idea. You cringe inside. Why does Jeff get all the credit and glory of your idea? Again!? This has happened before. Why don’t you speak up? You know why. It’s fear. Plain and simple. FEAR. The 'ole "500 pound fear gorilla" set in and is sitting on your chest. Ugh!  You’re afraid of looking stupid. You’re afraid of sounding like a crazy person. You’re afraid of sounding dumb. I know, I know. I’ve been there. I understand. But here’s the thing…you’ve got to stop letting Jeff and others get the glory. It’s time to step into your power, embrace your inner tiger, and bring YOU to the world. In all your glory! “But how?” you say, “I’m a scared little bunny with a gorilla sitting on my chest.” Yes, we all have a scared little bunny inside of us. That is true. We all also have a ferocious tiger inside of us, a fierce tiger that will protect you and your bunny. It’s time to let her out to play.  It’s time to adult. Yes, we’ve started using “adult” as a verb. When we “adult” we “act like a grownup.” One aspect of “adulting” (Yes, now we’re even going to gerund our new verb! Oh! I did it again!) is consciously choosing our behaviors. As adults, we pay close attention to our feelings and wisely choose appropriate responses and behaviors. Sometimes it’s appropriate to have a “bunny response” that is gentle, warm and fuzzy. Sometimes it’s appropriate to have a “fierce tiger response” that is direct, bold, and tough. Once we’ve selected our response, we plan and act. This is part of adulting.  Three Times to Engage Your Fierce Inner Tiger: There may be more than this, but these are three of the most frequent situations that I see where we need our Fierce Inner Tigers.
 You’re not stupid, crazy, or dumb. You’re glorious! Let the world see your glory. As an adult, you have a responsibility to all you’ve learned and accomplished. You have a responsibility to your experience and expertise. You have a responsibility to the world to share who you are and what you know.
Let go of fear. Stop playing small. It doesn’t benefit you or anyone else (except maybe Jeff, and you don’t need to do him anymore favors). You and the world are going to love your Fierce Inner Tiger. Are you challenged to let your Fierce Inner Tiger out as much as you’d like? Let’s talk. Book a Discovery Session with me. It’s free. We’ll talk about your Fierce Inner Tiger. Click here to book today: https://bookme.name/lisaliszcz/ I love comments! Be bold NOW. Comment below. Tell me what you think of my post. Thank you!  Most of us live most of our lives unconsciously. We are not mindful. We are not present. We miss what others are saying and doing. We miss what is going on around us. Studies show that we miss about 47% of what is going on around us. We miss about 47% of our lives. Have you ever been driving and all of a sudden not known exactly where you were? You look up, and you think, “Oh, I’m already here?!” Or you’re in a meeting, and you missed the last minute or so of what was said? I call that my mini vacation to the Bahamas. It happens. But some people are so present all the time, or almost all of the time. How do they do it? They are mindful. Ok, so we don’t always catch everything that is going on around us. What about what is going on inside us – our thoughts, feelings, and attention? When we are not aware of what is going on within, we are at the whim of our ego, our unconscious mind, and circumstances around us. Self-talk, biases, and untested beliefs are driving our thoughts and behaviors instead of our conscious mind and our hearts. That can lead us to repetitive cycles of worry, frustration, shame, and lack of moving forward on our goals. We like our routines because we don’t have to think about them. We like our routine actions and our routine thoughts. They are comfortable. Our routines don’t take much mental energy. We can accomplish them on “automatic pilot”.  When we are learning or doing something new, it takes more mental energy. We engage the prefrontal cortex of our brain to develop new habits or to find a new route to work. Once a behavior or thought pattern becomes habit, the behavior is managed in the basal ganglia. Neuroplasticity is the function that creates habits in our brains. You can read more here. Until a behavior, physical or mental, becomes habit, it takes more energy and consciousness. We need to be mindful to get the results we want. This is important when we set new goals for ourselves or anytime we are doing something new. We hear that effective leaders have emotional intelligence, are motivating, are good listeners and communicators, and build relationships effectively. Effective leaders manage conflict well. They hire, retain, and develop talent; and they are role models for others. All of these skills begin with mindfulness. If I can’t manage my brain, I can’t manage myself. For optimal performance, I must manage my thoughts. So, what is mindfulness? Mindfulness is the quality or state of being conscious or aware. It is a deep and peaceful state. You can achieve it just about anywhere at any time. It sounds like work, but it’s really about letting go of much of the activity of the egoic mind.  Are you the master of your thoughts, self-talk, and emotions? Mindfulness will help and will raise your work and life experience to the next level.
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AND we want to be comfortable – all day long – and be able to travel and go from meeting to meeting without worrying about wrinkles or wardrobe malfunctions. Sounds easy, right? It’s not.
Women, ever worn a jacket that doesn’t fit right or move well? Ever worked all day and gone to an evening business event, spending 14 hours or more in your suit and… well, it looks like it? Enter Nina McLemore, a designer who uses the best fabrics, designs and service to help her hard-working sisters in business and communities look and feel our best while we’re out doing our best. Women, Are you ready to look and feel bold, confident and gorgeous while doing what you do? Men, Do you have a woman in your life you would like to empower?
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 | Here's to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes... the ones who see things differently -- they're not fond of rules... You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can't do is ignore them because they change things... |
Our world is changing so much. Change is in the economy, culture, science, and technology. We need our crazy ones. We need you to help us deal with this change. Will you?
It’s time to stand out.
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